Guilty Pleasure

Sally is sleeping, my work for the day is done (work for my job, that is—my work is never done), and Sally will be asleep for at least another hour and a half (I hope). I think I’ll take a nap myself.

I must admit that I do feel somewhat guilty having a nap today. The reason why I’m not working now (I usually for 2 hours each day while Sally is napping) is because I hired one of my friends to watch Sally in the morning for 3 hours (which will now occur once a week). I decided that it wouldn’t be too horrible to get a sitter once in a while so I could once again enjoy a bit of down time each day, as I did when I wasn’t working. Despite what I just said, I still feel guilty about it, but I’m not sure why.

I think that 3 hours of playing away from mommy each week will be good for Sally’s social development and will help with the separation anxiety that seems to have gotten worse the last few months. I decided the other day that until I learn to mellow out, Sally probably won’t mellow out (meaning I need to do some mental “letting go” of Sally before she’ll stop freaking out every time I leave her with someone else). Thus came the decision to fork out some money and buy myself some away time.

Sally had a good time today. My friend has a little boy about 6 weeks younger than Sally, and they seem to get along well. She knows him from nursery, and she may remember going to this house once a week when I worked at my old job. Hard to say if she can really remember, but she seemed quite comfortable in the home. So far so good.

My nap is calling. I haven’t been sleeping well lately, and I’m not sure why. It seems that the more tired my body gets, the more active my mind gets. It also doesn’t help that Neal is commonly gone at night now. For all of his hogging of the bed and stealing of covers, I should be sleeping better without him there! Anyhow, I guess I’ll sleep when I can. Like now.